T.e.N.S.e

sometime i do fell under-appreciate and sometime i do fell like being use by someone.. sometime i do get confused whether what i'm doing is right or wrong. it's quit tense to be in such situation.

i've being paid to do what i have to do.. the job that according to my job scoop. but sometime i feel it wont hurt if i do a bit of "charity" by helping those "in need". but at the end, i myself would feel like nothing! useless to help them. it's not like i'm hoping ur money, ur present... it just a bit of respect n the word 'THANK YOU' would be enough.

there was a time when somebody said "i really like ur personality and appearance, u look really tidy n firm" but currently that person has already being such a nuisance to me. it makes me think whether what the person said before is really true or he just want to "kiss my bud" so that i would do anything that he ask me to.. such a stupid. u can't really trust anybody. remember 'don't judge the book by it's cover'. it's true! i've learn so many thing here.. thank you!

for the time being i would like to have myself calm. i don't want to rush for anything. and i would only do what i feel like i want to do , when i want to do it. uhh.... i wish cik wan was by my side. it's really killing me now. no body to talk to, no one to share. it's not like friendship is worthless. but friend and husband is just different. for me my hubby is my friend to share, my enemy to envy n my companion to be loved!! wish that you are here now!!

 lots..of..lots...of..work to do now.. currently doing the clerical job. typing and typing some more.. so tired..